So today was the day I got my driver’s license, and that was nerve wrecking enough. I was particularly scared because I was driving there when I hit a squirrel. My heart shattered, for this was the first time I had hit anything. I continued driving and went to the DMV. I was a nervous wreck, but I did get my license. Then, later while at McDonalds, our order costs $6.66 or as the superstitious employee said “triple six.” Not to mention, my dad dropped a motor on his finger messing up his finger nail pretty bad. “I broke a nail” does not cut it. I’ll drop a photo below.
So today was just a day of bad omens, so I’m still waiting for what this is leading to. I am not really superstitious, but today was a bit suspicious. Well any who, I got my license. Look below ❤ (:
It is so hard to believe that tomorrow, August 24th, I will bee 16. I can remember being 5 years old and laughing so hard that milk came out of my nose, and here I am in my junior year, fixing to be on the road. It blows my mind how fast time has gone by, and the more I learn to appreciate it, the more I don’t want it to go by so fast. I already see the difficulties in life, and my mind takes me back to a simpler time when my biggest issue was what outfit I wanted to wear or when I was going to grandma’s. Now I’d give anything in the world to go back. So much has happened, and I am definitely a different person than I was a year ago. More heartache and pain has come my way, and though it hurt me, it also made me stronger and wiser. I am still young, but I am learning. I’m looking at jobs and what I’m going to drive, and I can recall thinking at about 7 years old how much I couldn’t wait to be able to do these things. Yes, it is exciting. It is also quite frightening. I wish my mother would have sat me down and explained to me then that it would come to me eventually and just enjoy being little. My brother is graduated, and in the National Guard. That is still a huge thing to me. Not only that, he is ENGAGED!!! MY BROTHER! I just can’t believe we aren’t running around the backyard like Indians anymore or going to the circus together. All that is gone, and it breaks my heart. I miss being the only girl in his everyday life, and now some girl has came and stole him away. I knew it’d happen; I just didn’t expect it so soon. I am so proud of who he has become. 16 is another year closer to being an adult, another year closer to the end of my life. I hold onto the past but embrace the future, because God knows I can’t go back now. I just pray for wisdom and strength to get me through the rest of my life. I am blessed to be alive this long, and hope to leave behind a lot in my lifetime. No longer am I a 15 year old girl, I am a 16 year old woman and I tend to live the life I love. Wish me luck ❤
She runs like the wind
and walks in the middle of the road
Everywhere she goes she leaves a huge dent
She doesn’t like to do what she’s told
She’s a rebel child with a wild side
But when you look at her you can’t help but smile
She loves long walks
and she loves long talks
But sometimes all she wants is silence,
to sit in the middle of nature and take it all in
She doesn’t smoke and she doesn’t drink
but she likes to say what she thinks
Sometimes her opinions are a little bit loud
and sometimes she’s a bit too proud
She realizes she’s human
She repents for her sin
But she still takes the world on each day
She still takes everyone’s breath away
She likes her nails painted black
and the skies painted red
She’s got something the world lacks
but she believes she’s nothing in her head
She’s innocent yet definitely wild
She’s got a soul of wisdom and the heart of a child
She is as stubborn as a mule
and she makes her own rules
She always likes to take the lead
and she’s tilling the earth and planting her seed
No one could ever come in her way
She turns the night into her day
She’s a queen and she knows she stumbles
She can be mean but yet so humble
She’s a contradiction
But everyone’s addiction
On the outside you would think that she is pretty mild
but looking underneath you would find a spirit that is quite wild.
So if you ever think you know this girl, you are so wrong.
She’s the anchor in the sea, the light house on the shore, the one who is so fragile yet so strong.
I’m confused and broken again,
but why should I even try to mend?
I’ll just fall to the ground,
and there may not be enough of me found
to rejoin the broken pieces
I may be too shattered for the pain never ceases.
I am expected to be okay
but have you looked around lately?
Nothing is okay
and where am i suppose to run to safety?
My walls have been torn down to be rebuilt.
I have a broken heart and I need more shelter than my ribs.
The suffering never ends on this earth.
We were bound to sin since birth.
It doesn’t make any sense.
Why should I have to be broken again?
I’m tired of fixing myself.
Isn’t everyone else?
Why should we have to live this life?
We were born to evil and strife.
Just because one couple took an apple from a tree,
we have the chance of burning for eternity.
I love God, but these things I do not understand.
Why should I live in suffering because of the sin of one man and one woman?